Ask Shirley is the Knight Crier’s new advice column. Since Shirley is not trained or equipped to offer any real life-changing advice, we’d like to keep it to questions for which Shirley can get you some kind of answer. Here are a few entries to get the column started – we hope to hear from you soon!

Dear Shirley – Should I skip school on senior skip day? Thanks for the help, Confused Knight

Dear Confused Knight – I don’t know what to tell you, since it appears the new trend is to have many senior skip days. I don’t even know if there is an official one anymore so I have to tell  you – just go to school and skip in July.

Dear Shirley: How do I get from K pod to B pod in 4 minutes? Thank you, Jeff T.

Dear Jeff T., – You can’t. Thanks for asking though.

Dear Shirley: So rumor has it that the pool is on the 3rd floor of K pod. Where does one find this pool?  Thanks, Lost in K Pod

Dear Lost in K Pod, – the pool on 3rd floor K pod is only accessible to sophomores.

Dear Shirley-  I am a little bit confused. Most pods usually take up a certain area, not a hallway of another pod. Why is D pod thing? Thanks in advance, Wondering in World Cultures Class

Dear Wondering in World Cultures Class, I don’t know if you are aware of the D pod liberation war of 1983. But during the 80s, D pod wanted to secede from E pod because of a dispute over the smells of cafeteria food cooking… it’s a long story and Mr. Hynes could tell you much more about it. In short, unlike Montgomery Township’s attempt to secede from NP, D pod was successful.

Make sure you remember to send in your questions at [email protected].